Many poets say there is no greater feeling than the race of one’s heartbeat as one draws toward a kiss. I tend to agree. Perhaps the addictive nature of sexuality is less the physical act and more the feeling of temptation, curiosity, and anticipation that makes your heart jump out of your chest shortly before the tension is released. The important thing about sexual tension is to recognize its effects, and understand its power.
Sexual Tension is a Very Strong Feeling
It’s almost like an emotion of its very own, and it’s the thing that can make a weak man fall to his knees. In fact, how well you react to such tension is sometimes a subtle test that a woman performs to figure out if you are an attractive or quality man or not.
For this reason, it’s important to keep an edge. If the tension leads to flat-out nervousness, you’re in trouble. When a woman you’re attracted to draws near, and your voice quivers or you lose your ability to think properly, you’re already too affected by the situation, and you may have blown it.
So, watch how very suave men handle these types of situations. They often play it off a little bit, or very naturally respond with their own interest by wrapping their arms around the woman’s waist and looking into her eyes while continuing the conversation as normal.
The Tension is Often Mutual
It’s 12 AM. You’re sitting next to a girl on a couch at a party, and you suddenly have a strong desire to kiss her on the mouth. Most of the time, she’s thinking the same thing, and waiting for you to act on it.
The consequences of NOT kissing her can be severe. She may blame you for the missed opportunity—she’ll call her friends with remarks like “that guy was so clueless!”. Often, she’s angry because in essence you blue balled her, she felt the tension but never received the release. In other words, she’s expecting you to actually do something, so don’t blow it.
Tension Can Be Long Term
The most intense bouts are often related to long-term situations with female friends. So long as you’re not hopelessly in some type of friend zone, then the women we interact with on a day-to-day basis, such as at work or at school, are the ones we may develop intense (but often unseen) sexual tension with.
These situations can often become rather epic. When both parties discover the sexual tension was—all along—mutual, then it can lead to those awesome moments where two people attack each other and clothes are suddenly ripped off in a torrent of kissing.
Tension is Fueled by Banter
The greatest way to increase the amount of tension is to tease, banter, and be playful. And the best way to do this is to take your interaction with the girl less seriously. Relax, stop trying to impress her so much. For reasons I don’t entirely understand, playfulness is linked directly to sexual desire. The more the dynamic changes to light teasing and other schoolyard behavior, the more likely it’s going to become hot and heavy.
Sexual tension is a beautiful thing and it should not be underestimated nor ignored, as it’s one of the greatest ways to infuse a budding relationship. However, a major sign that your skills with girls needs improvement is when you ignore such tension. It’s very important to become socially acclimated enough to not only handle the intense feelings when they arise; but to recognize their existence so you’re not accidentally ignoring what a girl thinks is an obvious dynamic where you’re supposed to make a move.
Want to learn more about creating sexual tension? I have a few secrets at this link.